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Home Cycling

Inflated Sense Of Self – Bike Snob NYC

April 27, 2025
in Cycling
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Inflated Sense Of Self – Bike Snob NYC
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Additional to yesterday’s put up about drivers operating into folks, a reader informs me that Subaru has launched a brand new cyclist-coddling airbag:

Doesn’t that look cozy? Now hitting a bike owner will probably be much less like vehicular assault and extra like placing a child down for a nap:

I sit up for the up to date model that performs soothing music and deploys a blanket to maintain the sufferer cozy till first responders arrive.

And but clearly the airbag division and the physique design division at Subaru don’t work together with one another in any respect, as a result of on the similar time they appear to be redesigning the entrance ends of their vehicles to maximise cyclist-battering functionality:

See how a lot flatter the grill is getting?

What good is that doggy mattress airbag if you happen to don’t wind up on it within the first place?

Anyway, wanna see a sleek entrance finish? Now this can be a sleek entrance finish:

With the climate as pleasant because it’s been just lately I couldn’t resist commuting by bicycle yesterday, and the spring hues have been sufficient to make you wanna puke:

As have been the various different folks having fun with themselves:

There’s nothing I hate greater than seeing folks having fun with themselves.

Whereas today I’ve turn out to be a type of “woosie” occasional fair-weather bicycle commuters, it’s vital to do not forget that I singlehandedly invented just about your complete city biking lexicon:

Whereas this in itself is ironic, what’s doubly ironic is that there’s a typical false impression that shoaling is one more cultural instance of males asserting their dominance over ladies:

Nonsense. As each a person and the one that coined the time period I can guarantee you that gender has nothing to do with it and that ladies shoal me on a regular basis:

Although I used to be using the Homer, and possibly there’s simply one thing quaint and endearing a few Rivendell that screams “shoal me.”

Sure, some issues in New York by no means change. One among them is shoaling, and one other is the Holland Tunnel visitors on Varick Avenue, which has as soon as once more been clumpy and thick regardless of congestion pricing:

The result’s blocked crosswalks when the sunshine adjustments:

That’s just about the Doge meme in actual life, and it’s even in a Tesla for max poignancy:

Clearly the canine and the pedestrian really feel fairly in a different way concerning the scenario:

And eventually, talking of my contributions to society, I’m happy to announce I’ve succeeded in fully bending the narrative round each the Trek Y-Foil and George Plimpton to my will:

And after I say fully, I do imply fully:

They are saying historical past is written by the victors, however I think it’s principally written by the wiseasses.

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